Felix Mon – Homepage

Imagine that, ur magic blade becomes Iphone, ur divine horse becomes Bugatti, ur golden inventory becomes a big house on the beverly hill, and ur wife, of course becomes ur wife, or u choose to take a trip to the city of Dong Guan. For all these, u just need to find out the patterns, follow them, use ur god-damned brian to do some micro control of urself, and the rest is depend on God, who knows, u may die, well, obviously u will be still alive by tomorrow, but u may get robbed, sick or exhausted, physically or mentally, then u become disordered, that’s the way it is, u can either go back on track or continue falling, then u’ll know what butter-fly effect is.

The game kicks off the moment we were born, we may choose either enjoy or suffer from it, there’s no such button as "Exit to Windows" or "Load/Save", but "Commit Suicide", ur call.

They say "what doesn’t kill you makes you stronger", quite inspiring, but they can only say that after your surviving all those terrible hours, you never know whether you can find your way out when surrounded by the overwhelming darkness solely and helplessly.

Never has death been so close and friendly to you, you look at it, grin with tears, and see the eternal peace drenched in your own blood.

Nothing else matters.

I wrote this first in Chinese(not including the title), so please pardon the poor translation.

Few native Chinese men has not even a slight bit of Virgin Complex, which means, in a way, not only the present, but the past or even the future of a woman a man wants to have. Thanks to this distorted society dominated by men, whom great tolernce has been spared to, but little to women. The Western society used to judge a woman by her virgin status, say, the chastity belt used by the Crusade to their wives. I remember that in the late 19 century there was a reform of people’s attitudes toward virgin, and the Hippies in the 60s of 20 century made an even greater step.

I think we all agree that a woman never have to reserve anything of her to a man who doesn’t even exist. So what does it really mean when a woman has slept with a(or many) man before she meets you? Does it make her a slut? Well, if so, you really don’t think it would make her a slut as well when she sleeps with you? Dirty? Once touched, she will never be clean ever again, no matter how hard she tries. Wow~~~ What a vicious idea imposed on us, whom then use it to judge everything. I think this idea may be something derived from some remote religion, and only grew stronger as the time ages. But if we would be more careful, we would find the idea, which’s actually saying that a bowl can never be washed clean just because one has laid a single finger on it, more ridiculous than anything else. A woman(or a girl) is truely pure and chaste as long as she’s loyal to her beloved one and has strong self-esteem, regardless of her incomplete or being once had, just like the life of a flower, intact in color despite of the strikes of storms and bites of worms, and still fragrant in the air when crushed into ashes.

Therefore, I shall refuse to be one among the countless lovers whose love was sabotaged by this venomous idea which had been used to help the emperors and priests to retain their sovereign in the guise of true virtue for thousands of years.

She said: YES.

My pursuit of companion has come a long way. Yet there’s so much farther to go before this can make pretense to be anywhere near the true happiness. I will always be grateful to her, regardless of what might happen in the future.

Solitude had been an old friend of mine. Memories of retired walk and murmuring are still so vivid, which once were daily prayers, now seem a monument of my wild past. Sorrows, miseries, pains, what are they but heaps of sand, gone with the wind.

Let me not dismay her angel face, but harebell and primrose strew her day.

My Minor dissertation is link to Marital Rape. I’ve come to some views during these days, though raw and unlogical, I want to post them here to get some response from you all.

Please Note That The Following Contains Possible Disturbing Words Related To Sexual Content.

There has been a very trite reason that marital rape is not considered a criminal act, that they are couples, for Christ’s sake, they are husband and wife, the holy union under the God, the wife is supposed to devote all her virginity to her life partner, her soul mate, and accept his will above hers. In China, that means "Right To Cohabit".

Well yes "cohabit" means "To live together in a sexual relationship", but the statue in China only says "No one who has a spouse may cohabit with any other person." So I think at this level some people may have distorted the meaning of that article. They think that a husband can legally ground his wife, thus have some "legal sex", which’s totally ridiculous, for they only has to right to ask his wife not to sleep with another guy, but never coerce his wife to have sex against her will. There’s no such right as coercive cohabitation with a woman.

Some experts say that the marriage is like a contract, once a woman is married to a man, she makes an agreement that she volunteers to have sex with his husband as long as their marriage continues, and that is absurb too. What’s sex? Vaginal Penetration? Aside the ejaculation part, it means no more than a casual touch of skins, and no different from shaking hands or a hug. So at this level, those expert are actually saying, a husband can "touch" his wife legally anytime he wants even when violence involved, so, if she got battered by her husband, there’s nothing the law can do about it. Crap!

In my point of view, Marital Rape is no doubt a criminal act and should be pubished more severely than the Stranger Rape, because physically the later is often one-off, but the former one is very likely to be repeated, and mentally Marital Rape is a betrayal of the mutual trust, the victim is certainly to get very confused after the traumatic experience.

One of the main reasons why the Marital Rape is still not made a criminal act in China, is the judicial officials think it would be too difficult to collect the evidence. Well it’s their job and they should do something about it instead of sitting there and ignore the domestic screams.

Religion fails if you do not devote to anything.

Seriously, loneliness is the most terrible experience in this modern world. Thanks to the revolution of technology and development of economy, the ways we believe in things have changed dramatically for that last hundred years. Atheism has sucessfully becomed a part of our nature, in a way or another, no matter how small or how big, it does exist, which distracts us from the full devotion to God, then terrible things happen when loneliness strikes from nowhere, the poor knowledge of either can hardly save us from the misery, we can find no satisfactory anwser to our dilema, nor ways of getting out of being pathetic, we all become wishy-washy, limp-wristed, turning to the mumbo-jumbo in the best-sellers, we may feel relieved for a while, but later fall deeper in the gaping hole.

Maybe that’s acceptable to some, but not to young men like me, we’re experiencing the most wonderful and most energetic period of our entire lives, we can not afford to waste it, we need to do something about it, we need to smart up, for once in life time.

Devotion is the crucial part of doing this. It maybe a tough decision, but that’s the decision we have to make, cause without it, we’re nothing but walking dead. Milton Friedman died this Thursday, I mourn him, to me he was a great man, for he had devoted his whole life in a displine just like hundreds of his eminent predecessors, no matter they were Christians like St. Aquinas or Atheists like Einstein.

With this enthusiastic and pious devotion we can face anything including the annoying loneliness, which would probably get dispelled. We maybe alone during the progress, but never lonely, cause deep down in our souls, we have company.